Choices! Our lives are filled with them.
These choices could be of minimal importance (for example buying one piece of
meat or two for your food) or they could be life-changing. Some choices leave a
lasting impression while others are quickly forgotten. Either way, choices are
extremely important to each individual.
Many persons shy away from making
choices, however, especially on big matters. They would rather follow the consensus
or defer to someone else to make these choices on their behalf. Their major
concern might be that they will not make the right decisions or this is just
too stressful. If you are on this table, please come down let’s talk…
While decisions might seem tough to
make, they are not impossible to make. There might be numerous examples of
wrong decisions and the terrible blowback received, but there are also as many
examples of great choices made and the great benefits received. I have studied
some successful persons and have come up with a series of tips that might have
enabled them to make the right choices. Although the tips might not be
exhaustive, they contain important points that will definitely help your
decision-making process. Okay, enough of the ceremony, let’s get to it.
Determine
what you want
This might not be what you expected to
hear first as you obviously came here to know how to make decisions. But this
step is important. As David Welch, PhD, professor of political science at the
University of Waterloo in Ontario and author of Decisions,
Decisions: The Art of Effective Decision Making,
explains, “People who aren’t self-reflective are going to end up making bad
decisions because they don’t really know what they want in the first place.”
What this then entails is understanding exactly what your goals are. What do
you intend to achieve with this choice? Once you have this down, it becomes
easier to make the necessary decisions.
Don’t
fear the consequences
Whether we want to make big decisions or
smaller ones, we always try to predict the future. Whatever choice we make
depends on the one we think will bring us greater happiness overall. One
problem, however, is that we are not especially good at predicting the future
(some ‘prophets’ would think otherwise though). At times we end up exaggerating
the possible effects of a choice. What this triggers is what is termed Loss
Aversion – the belief that a loss will hurt
more than a corresponding gain will please – and that does not help us make
necessarily better decisions. So rather than dwelling excessively on the
possible effects, remember that the negative effects are usually not as bad as
you think. Note that the worst might never happen, so don’t always play it
safe.
Consider
your emotions
Emotions are critical factors that determine the choices we make. Several studies have pointed out how our current mood affects a decision we make. It is not always a bad thing to make decisions based on our emotions (gut feelings); humans are generally wired to make emotional split-second decisions when faced with a threatening situation. But one should be careful to understand how each emotion affects certain decisions. For instance, an angry person would make more rash decisions and a sad person would most likely make self-detrimental decisions. Make decisions only if the mood is right.
Ask
for advice, but make your own choice
It is always good to have a second and
even a third perspective on a particular situation. Usually, there is someone
who always knows something about what you intend to do, and it is not out of
place to get their opinions before making a decision. But remember this: any
choice you make should be yours. No one is living your life; no one knows
exactly how you feel, so no one should make a decision for you. Take advice as it
is: just a piece of advice.
Don’t
procrastinate
Three things are certain: Death, Taxes,
and nothing will ever be perfect. The more you expect perfection, the more time
you spend on a wild goose chase. Note that you cannot make a perfect decision;
you can make a good enough one. So don’t waste any time delaying a decision.
According to Voltaire, “Perfect is the enemy of the good.”
Avoid
social pressures
An encyclopaedia can be written on how most persons make decisions based solely on the consensus on the matter. This makes some persons run into trouble as there usually is not a ‘one size fits all’ solution to a particular issue. Countless examples of persons who made wrong decisions due to peer pressure abound, and the number keeps growing. Beware of this trap, don’t fall into it. Make sure that whatever you choose is your choice, not the general one. It pays to be the contrarian in some instances.
Note that this is not always the case. There
are some situations where following the crowd is the right way to go. Some of
these are discussed in John Bonazzo’s article
on being a lemming (Someone who blindly follows a crowd—maybe even toward
catastrophe).
Streamline
your options
Some think that it is better if one has
a greater number of options to choose from. This is not always the case. It makes
the choosing process more tedious, especially for those that like to go through
all their options at length before making a decision.
One way to cut down the number of
choices is by setting standards for yourself. Anything below your standard
should be eliminated from the list of options. In some cases, setting a
ceiling, especially for purchases, helps us refrain from going overboard with
our choices.
Trust
your judgements
Have confidence in your judgements. Own the
choices you make; it will make you feel better about the repercussions that
come from the choice, whether positive or negative. It also makes it easier to
make the next choice.
Making a choice is like flexing a muscle. For every decision you make, the next one comes easier. The contentment you get from making your own decisions generally surpasses the possible pain you expect to face. Remember: The Choice is Yours!